SongLyricsSunday-“Lying” 8-6-17

One of my “areas of expertise” as a Psychotherapist is relationships, but do not take the following as professional advice. Certain decisions are 100% personal.

Something I have seen so many times is outright lying, and I still don’t understand it.

It’s one thing to engage, for example, in “cheating” in a relationship. It’s a whole different level of yuck to lie about it, straight to someone’s face…even AFTER you’ve been caught!

I can almost understand the act of being unfaithful…there is almost always a perceived element of being carried away by something bigger than oneself, feeling helpless in the face of something, etc.

But the lying part…willful…crazy-making…calculated…that’s the part that would do me in. I couldn’t cheat because I would suffocate under the incredible crushing weight of the having to lie part.

And the lying part ends up to be the most damaging part of the whole thing, not the act of infidelity itself.

People who do finally do tell the truth about cheating can rarely offer good explanations.

Even my own former husband, after 13 years of what I thought was wedded bliss, only had this excuse to offer when I asked him why.

“Well, I thought I could get away with it.”

So if you wandered and did not get caught, think long and hard before indulging in that guilt-relieving dump some people feel compelled to do under the guise of total honesty, or “coming clean”. It is usually just for the cheater to get out from under the hefty guilt-weight of his or her actions. Or worse, it’s a passive aggressive move to make sure your indiscretion is known so it can actually hurt your partner.

That is your shit to carry…possibly forever. So shut the fuck up and live with it. Deal with the real issues!

But if you have been busted, tell the truth, for God’s sake!!

Don’t gaslight someone you supposedly love.

 

End of obviously biased lecture of the day!

Lyrics from Google Play

There ain’t no use in me trying to tell you how I feel
’cause what I feel ain’t what you’re feeling
I don’t know what we did wrong
I just know if you come home
I ain’t gonna let you break my heart again

There ain’t no use in me trying to find out where you’ve been
Where you’ve been ain’t where I’m going
’cause if I ask you where you’ve been
The hurting starts and it don’t end
So I ain’t gonna let you break my heart again, no
I ain’t gonna let you break my heart again, no no

Tears don’t become me
Pain ain’t my friend
It seems like you enjoy my crying, baby
You always said that I was strong
But I believe that you were wrong
Lately, God knows, I have been trying

There ain’t no use in you trying to kiss away the hurt, baby
’cause it hurts where it’s deep down inside of me and it’s hiding
If you decide you’re coming home
You walk in, it won’t be like before
’cause I ain’t gonna let you break my heart again, no
Ain’t gonna let you break my heart again, no no

Written by David Lasley, Julie Lasley • Copyright © Universal Music Publishing Group
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Song Lyric Sunday Theme for 8/6/17

“Satisfaction” for WPC 7-26-17 by ChosenPerspectives

Satisfaction

This is going to seem like a post about dis-satisfaction but it is not, honest.

At my house this week, we are experiencing the frustrating, man-made phenomenon of absolute waste.

Next door to me, there is a perfectly lovely home, built in the late 1980’s.

 

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My neighbor had to sell. I understand that. But she sold to a builder of McMansions…(look it up)

Many of us tried for months to get permission to salvage what we could from the soon to be demolished house, for recycle, reclaiming and re-use. I’m talking about perfectly good appliances, beautiful hardwood flooring, lovely tiles, great carpet, two complete sets of kitchen counters and cabinets, shelving, French doors, and beautiful bathroom vanities!

That process was so political. So slow!! Like molasses! Before she moved, we, at least, were able to get the brand new refrigerator out of my neighbor’s student apartment. Perfect timing as we have just moved into our own basement apartment so that Son and Grandsons could move in. But the rest of what would have furnished a sweet kitchen, bathroom and bedroom for us downstairs, well, we just couldn’t cut through the red tape fast enough.

It’s been frustrating to say the least. Especially because James is a custom home designer and builder and is a master at reclaiming older reusable parts and pieces for new homes. Oh, what he could have built us!

At least, several neighbors showed up to save a whole mess of strawberry plants and a stunning long row of Lavender!

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So at this point you are wondering what in the world this has to do with Satisfaction.

I’m almost there…

Well, the backhoes showed up yesterday. Here’s what James wrote in his family email.

We watched as the machine ate the neighbor’s house like a Tyrannosaurus Rex, gobbling and crunching it like so much soft meat. 

I could not have said it better…except maybe to add the word Bulimia in there somewhere! Chewed it up and vomited it right back out!

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In a matter of hours…destroyed…consumed…

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the offending backhoe in its “food coma”

OK, OK Satisfaction already!

Trying to ignore what was happening next door yesterday, we focused on fixing up our little apartment, mostly the tiny kitchenette. I was grumbling because the carpet in there is destroyed from a burst pipe earlier this year and has been covered with ugly throw rugs. James was grumbling because he had recently finally thrown away a piece of good carpet he’d kept for years that now, would have come in handy in this kitchenette.

Next thing I know, he is tearing across the lawn between us and the house destruction project. He grabs the project manager, has a quick talk (over the backhoe noise) and literally minutes before the Tyrannosaurus bites into it’s next gourmet house section, James rips out a whole room full of brand new carpet and hauls it across the grass to its new home…our kitchen!!!

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Take that, you lazy, wasteful developer!!!

Now THAT was satisfying!

 

PS I have to admit I also found it very satisfying that there was a clandestine project for the last several nights. After the work crews left and after it got dark enough, a young family, Mom, Dad and 3 little kids, showed up night after night, and for hours, dug out the brick driveway pavers, one beautiful brick at a time. The young man told me they have a place where they can sell them for a lot of money (which they desperately need). And just so you don’t think I support theft, the project manager told me yesterday, they knew it was going on and ignored it. Also satisfying!

Song Lyrics Sunday 7/30/17

The theme this week from Helen is Colors. Another obvious one from me but maybe I will post it first or something…

Thanks Helen. This song is certainly still relevant today!!
https://www.google.com/search?q=true+colors+video&oq=true&aqs=chrome.2.69i57j0j35i39l2j0l2.7386j0j7&sourceid=chrome&ie=UTF-8

Ain’t Cyndi somethin’!!!

True Colors
You with the sad eyes
Don’t be discouraged
Oh I realize
Its hard to take courage
In a world full of people
You can lose sight of it all
And the darkness inside you
Can make you feel so small
But I see your true colors
Shining through
I see your true colors
And that’s why I love you
So don’t be afraid to let them show
Your true colors
True colors are beautiful
Like a rainbow
Show me a smile then
Don’t be unhappy, can’t remember
When I last saw you laughing
If this world makes you crazy
And you’ve taken all you can bear
You call me up
Because you know I’ll be there
And I’ll see your true colors
Shining through
I see your true colors
And that’s why I love you
So don’t be afraid to let them show
Your true colors
True colors are beautiful
Like a rainbow
If this world makes you crazy
And you’ve taken all you can bear
You call me up
Because you know I’ll be there
And I’ll see your true colors
Shining through
I see your true colors
And that’s why I love you
So don’t be afraid to let them show
Your true colors
True colors
True colors
Shining through
I see your true colors
And that’s why I love you
So don’t be afraid to let them show
Your true colors
True colors are beautiful
Like a rainbow
Songwriters: Billy Steinberg / Tom Kelly
True Colors lyrics © Sony/ATV Music Publishing LLC

Song Lyric Sunday Theme for 7/30/17

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ChosenPerspectives on Collage for WPC 7/12/17

Collage

My life is FILLED with “Collage”. I love surrounding myself with collections in categories.

The are each a Collage I made for someone else (top to bottom). A jewelry box filled with the jewelry pieces from a dear friend’s Mom, Memory Boxes for my Grandsons containing tiny symbols and souvenirs from their adventures, and photo cards.

My dear friend who gave me her mother’s jewelry pieces and old jewelry box above inspired me to facilitate a Collaging for Grief Workshop. My participants would collect the small things they couldn’t part with after a death. We would gather together to put all the trinkets in collage shadow boxes, all the while telling each other the stories behind the pieces. It was a wonderful way to let go of the large piles of things we can be left with when a loved one dies, but still end up with a lovely memorial piece of art in their honor.

I have posted before the embarrassing proof that most of the walls in my home are giant Collages

This is a series I called “Toy Baskets”. Trinkets from my own childhood. If you are of a similar age you might recognize Monopoly, Pick up Stix, Tiddly Winks, etc.

 

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More Wall Collages from my home and Office

 

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I could never stand to throw away the beautiful cards my clients have given me over 40 years in private practice, so I would always turn them into collages and display them. They so enjoyed spotting a piece of a card I had saved from them.

And many of my clients have been artists so I have many beautiful handmade pieces.

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This is titled “a Million Tears” (cried in therapy). Each tear hand-inked with a blue pen

This one below is my favorite. It was when my practice was HUGE. I had 8 groups of 10 people each (5 therapy, 1 couples’ group, a Graduate Group, and a training group). The artist who did this mixed media sort of collage told me it represented the path of my heart through my professional life, with many, many connections shooting off into the world, like stars. I was so moved by this. The piece always remains a focal point of my current Wall Collage display. Hand done painting, stitching, gluing, etc. (I especially love this piece since my current practice is only 3 clients.) It’s so sweet to remember that I used to have a larger impact on my world…..

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She told me this central line was my heart path….connected to and spreading out to the world, each star and sequin representing a life I had touched. It’s taken me years to accept (not my focus at the time) that I really did get to love a lot of people!!

Author note: Sorry for bad photos and for lack of editing. I wanted to get this in before the new challenge happens today!

Song Lyrics Sunday 7/16/17 Duet

Song Lyric Sunday Theme for 7/16/17

From one of my favorite sleeper movies, DUETS!! The movie didn’t do well at the box office but I found it delightful and enjoyed the musical surprises from actors I didn’t know could sing!! (And a singer I didn’t know could act.)

 

Cruise

Baby let’s cruise, away from here
Don’t be confused, the way is clear
And if you want it you got it forever
This is not a one night stand
Let the music take your mind
Ooh just release and you will find

You’re gonna fly away, glad your goin’ my way
I love it when we’re cruising together
The music is played for love,
Cruising is made for love
I love it when we’re cruising together

Baby tonight belongs to us
Everything’s right, do what you must
And inch by inch we get closer and closer
To every little part of each other

Let the music take your mind
Just release and you will find

You’re gonna fly away, glad your goin’ my way
I love it when we’re cruising together
Music is played for love,
Cruising is made for love
I love it when we’re cruising together

Cruise with me baby
Cruise with me baby

So good

Baby lets cruise
Lets float, lets glide
Ooh lets open up and go inside

And if you want it you got it forever
I can just stay there inside you
And love you baby,
Let the music take your mind
Just release and you will find

You’re gonna fly away, glad your goin’ my way
I love it when we’re cruising together
Music is played for love,
Cruising is made for love
I love it when we’re cruising together

You’re gonna fly away, glad your goin’ my way
I love it when we’re cruising together
Music is played for love,
Cruising is made for love
I love it when we’re cruising together

You’re gonna fly away, glad your goin’ my way
I love it when we’re cruising together
The music is played for love,
Cruising is made for love
I love it when we’re cruising together

You’re gonna fly away, glad your goin’ my way
I love it when we’re cruising together
Music is played for love,
Cruising is made for love
I love it when we’re cruising together

 

Songwriters
ROBINSON, SMOKEY / TARPLIN, MARVIN

Read more: Gwyneth Paltrow & Huey Lewis – Cruisin’ Lyrics | MetroLyrics

 

And if that doesn’t blow your mind, try this unexpected combo!!

 

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